That Girl

Oh, tonight I'm feeling fine
I'm alone, just wasting time
No Friday movie nights
Or romantic candle lights

I'm just having conversations
With the thoughts in my head
All I hear are angels crying
Oh, won't they just sing instead
It would be wrong for me to say

I don't need that girl by my side
I don't need that girl in my life
I don't want to talk it out
Or hold her when she cries

I don't want to say she's my kind
I don't want to say that she's mine
I don't want to tell her that
I love her more than life
More than life, Yeah
Love her more than life
Yeah, yeah, yeah

Honestly, this won't do
How is she doing?
I tell myself I'm feeling swell
But I know I'm such a fool

I could take it as a new beginning
But you know I don't feel that way
Who will take all this pain away?
I know it's wrong for me to say
I don't need that girl by my side
I don't need that girl in my life
I don't want to talk it out
Or hold her when she cries

I don't want to say she's my kind
I don't want to say that she's mine
I don't want to tell her that
I love her more than life
More than life, Yeah
Love her more than life
Yeah, yeah, yeah

Talk about a sin
Was the day I walked into the other side
I would run back in
I wouldn't waste no time
I know it's wrong for me to say

I don't need that girl by my side
I don't need that girl in my life
I don't want to talk it out
Or hold her when she cries

I don't want to say she's my kind
I don't want to say that she's mine
I don't want to tell her that
I love her more than life
More than life, Yeah
Love her more than life
Yeah, yeah, yeah







This song touched me.

Patience

people have been telling me that my generation of people have no patience.
they dun wanna wait, nor work hard fer things, but they wanna enjoy the results

others aside,
i shall just talk about patience.

I ALMOST KAN CHOR WEI FOR WAITING TO ENTER!!!
90MINS IN A FUCKING NOT MOVING QUEUE.

k i dun deny its fun, though i prefer hiding in a corner during this particular period of time, for pushing and squeezing is too much fer my poor knee..

FML.

fml

leg better, but i still rotted my day away...
fml.

just edited my blog template and added some timers.
but i just realised, no one actually comes here.

so its a thrill only for myself...
bah

happy over nth

Rid the emo,
get on with life.

rewrite my failures,
reassure myself im still good

leg is getting better.
time to go out play tml =D

FlashBacks

This post is tagged stories and daily.
as, this is what really happened to me.
but when i type this, how i wished its just another emo creation of mine, and none is real....


Since young, i had always wanted to meet my better half in the most unexpected way in my life, as i would want to start off a relationship with her in the most explosive and exciting way.

As i look and look, i realised that there cant be so many coincidence that would cause such senarios to happen, and therefore made me give up on such a dream.

But you and me started of in one of the most bizzare way ever.

People kept asking, how did i know u, when there is almost no direct links between you and me. i just merely said, mutual friends.

But there are some friends, who are present, knows what happened. so i shall recount how we first met, though years back, it reminded me of how retarded i can be when i was younger.

A phrase that gone wrong
----------------------------
we first met at a concert, while u, a performer, me an audience here to support my best friend.
after concert, we met and say hi, short, yet memorable.
we splitted, u with your friends, while i with mine.
we met again at macdonalds and thats where everything started to go wrong.
i admit, while i was with my frenz, i told them aloud that i will get ur number the next time i see u. they sneered and say im only all talk, which i also admit, its partly true, as im quite confident the next time we meet, they would have forgotten these words.
but our mutual friend brought us to mac, whereby u are there as well.
GAME OVER for me.

i will have to do it. else be a loser for life.
it wasnt easy to approach a girl and get her number, especially in front of everyone, even though some are people i know as well.
i said something like, "我是用心来交朋友的！"
i failed, of course, for saying weird stuffs on first meeting
it became a joke to everyone, but it mark a very important begining.
one that i didnt know would make me like u.


i mean, lets be frank.
you have never been my type of girl.
imma crazy bangs-loving guy. and girls of my type would be of long hair, cute and nerdy(yes! i love nerdy girls)
you are like the complete opposite.
sporty short hair, sharp character, damn serious face.

i would be more scared of u, den to like u, if i didnt get to know u better.
but yea,as time goes by, i added u to fb, started talking to u on fb after seeing u at ssdc, the day i passed my ftt...
and from there on, got ur msn.

it was after my enlistment that i got your number.
u called to ask me about driving instructor.
and from then on, i got ur NUMBER AND MY SPAMMING STARTSS
MWSAAHHAHAAH
do u regret giving me ur number???
i sometimes do think about this.
maybe if i didnt got ur number, i wouldnt have gotten so smitten by u.

our conversation thru sms is a lifesaver, as army tend to be very boring with duties and suchs.
but when u are anticipating smses, time tend to go faster, and then on, i get to know u better.
i realised u aint a princess that i always thought u are, i realised that u cared for anyone and everyone, despite not showing it out, i realised that ur actually a very sweet girl, and i know that i sms u, u will definitely reply, only early or late.

your way of doing things, treating people and caring for everyone made me feel like a kid. i have never know out there, there are so many problems to be faced, so many shit to handle. it made all my overseas exposure, working experience and life experience looked so small, in comparison. and that is when i started understanding why "nurse dun like little boys"
its never about physical age. what really matter is mental age, and our gap is so big that i guess i only appeal to u like a little brother, not someone who can love and protect u.

I know all these, i know i should have let go, long long before anything more could develope. friends told me not to waste time, as they too know, she wun be the one for me. but i couldnt. i tried, but i couldnt.

u sometimes tell me i fallen for u because i still dunno u well, and i didnt have enuff chances to see the world and know better girls. i agree with u. but not fully, as u didnt know just how much charm u urself have as well.

well, i noticed a change between our msging pattern and i dismiss it off as if nth serious happened, i knew my worst nightmare is coming thru.
i know it would end, like how it have always ended.
it seeemed like a curse to me, every girl i liked, would definitely land up with a better guy.

now that im lost and im not sure where else to go, i wrote this entry to let out how i really feel.
and i hope that few mths or years later, i would read this again, and see if i have matured, gotten over the emo loser feeling that i had always felt. in fact, when i read back some posts of my failed pursues, i realised i haven grow up at all.

god, pls, help me grow up. let me be a better man.
getting over her is never a worry for me.
what that is worrying to me is,
why haven i grow up, while my peers have all surpassed me.




故事的小黃花　從出生那年就飄著
童年的蕩鞦韆　隨記憶一直晃到現在
ㄖㄨㄟ　ㄙㄡ　ㄙㄡ　ㄒ一　ㄉㄡ　ㄒ一
ㄌㄚ　ㄙㄡ　ㄌㄚ　ㄒ一　ㄒ一　ㄒ一　ㄒ一
ㄌㄚ　ㄒ一　ㄌㄚ　ㄙㄡ
吹著前奏望著天空　我想起花瓣試著掉落

＊為妳翹課的那一天　花落的那一天
　教室的那一間　我怎麼看不見
　消失的下雨天　我好想再淋一遍
　沒想到失去的勇氣我還留著
　好想再問一遍　妳會等待還是離開＊

＃颳風這天　我試過握著妳手
　但偏偏　雨漸漸大到　我看妳不見
　還要多久　我才能在妳身邊
　等待放晴的那天　也許我會比較好一點

　從前從前　有個人愛妳很久
　但偏偏　風漸漸　把距離吹得好遠
　好不容易　又能再多愛一天
　但故事的最後妳好像還是說了（拜拜）＃




漫天的話語　紛亂落在耳際　你我沉默不回應
牽你的手　你卻哭紅了眼睛　路途漫長無止盡
多想提起勇氣　好好的呵護你　不讓你受委屈　苦也願意

那些痛的記憶　落在春的泥土裡　滋養了大地　開出下一個花季
風中你的淚滴　滴滴落在回憶裡　讓我們取名叫做珍惜

迷霧散盡　一切終於變清晰　愛與痛都成回憶
遺忘過去　繁花燦爛在天際　等待已有了結局
我會提起勇氣　好好地呵護你　不讓你受委屈　苦也願意

那些痛的記憶　落在春的泥土裡　滋養了大地　開出下一個花季
風中你的淚滴　滴滴落在回憶裡　讓我們取名叫做珍惜

漫天紛飛的花語　落在春的泥土裡　滋養了大地　開出下一個花季
風中你的淚滴　滴滴落在回憶裡　讓我們取名叫做珍惜

那些痛的記憶　落在春的泥土裡　滋養了大地　開出下一個花季
風中你的淚滴　滴滴落在回憶裡　讓我們取名叫做珍惜

讓我們懂得學會珍惜


very last.
i wish u the best.
pls dont be sad for me, nor pity me.
coz im EvErywh3r3 =]

原来我从未习惯 你已不在我身旁

雨下一整晚歌词

街灯下的橱窗　有一种落寞的温暖
图贴在玻璃上　画着你的模样
开着车漫无目的地转弯不知要去哪个地方
闹区的电视墙 到底有谁在看

白杨木影子被拉长像我对你的思念走不完
原来我从未习惯　你已不在我身旁
街道的铁门被拉上只剩转角霓虹灯还在闪
这城市　的小巷　雨下一整晚

你撑把小纸伞　叹姻缘太婉转
唉~
雨落下雾茫茫　问天涯在何方　喔喔~
啊~午夜里　笛声残　偷偷透　透过窗
烛台前　我嘛还在想　
小舢舨　划呀划
小纸伞　遮雨也遮月光

白杨木影子被拉长像我对你的思念走不完
原来我从未习惯　你已不在我身旁
街道的铁门被拉上只剩转角霓虹灯还在闪
这城市　的小巷　雨下一整晚

failed

i just realised.

this time, i did the most "normal" things to woo a girl!
flower, chocolates.

but still fail.
fml

give cd also fail.
give program also fail.
give box of "heart" also fail.
go stalk also fail.
do wat also fail.

fail la...
nbcb pui

超人不会飞

妈妈说 很多事别太计较
只是使命感找到了我 我睡不着
如果说 骂人要有点技巧
我会加点旋律 你会觉得 超屌
我的枪 不会装弹药
所以放心 不会有人倒
我拍青蜂侠不需要替身
因为这些事我会绘画的颜料
我做很多事背后的意义有你们想象
打开电视就为了眼睛一瞬间的梦想
收视率再高也难看看我的伟大理想
因为我的人生无需再多一笔那奖项
我不知道何时变成了所谓的那榜样
被狗仔拍无奈被撞也要有道歉模样 怎样
我唱的歌词要有点文化
因为随时会被当教材
CNN能不能等英文好一点再访
时代杂志封面能不能重拍
随时随地注意形象
要控制饮食不然就跟杜莎夫人蜡像的我不像
好莱坞的中国戏院地上有很多手印脚印
何时才能看见我的脚
噢
如果超人会飞
那就让我在空中停一停歇
再次俯瞰这个世界
会让我觉得好一些
哦
拯救地球好累
虽然有些疲惫但我还是会
不要问我哭过了没
因为超人不能有眼泪
唱歌要拿最佳男歌手
拍电影也不能只拿个最佳新人
你不参加颁奖典礼就是没礼貌
你去参加就是代表你很 在乎
得奖时你感动落泪
人家就会觉得你夸张做作
你没表情别人就会说太嚣张
如果你天生这表情那些人甚至会怪你妈妈
结果最后是别人在得奖
你也要给别人充分的掌声与微笑
开的车不能太好
住的楼不能太高
我到底是一个创作歌手还是好人好事代表
专辑一出就必须是冠军
怕了电影就必须大卖
只能说当超人真的好难
如果超人会飞
那就让我在空中停一停歇
再次俯瞰这个世界
会让我觉得好一些
哦~~~拯救地球好累
虽然有些疲惫但我还是会
不要问我哭过了没
因为超人不能有眼泪

自我催眠

i dunno if i ever put this mv in my blog before.
but i feel damn small now.
felt inferior.
i cant get over this fucked up hweeling.
fml

no one comes here.

okie no one comes here.

too emo i supposed.

okie i shall draw more attention here =DDD





























































.

my stories. my life

i remember having a blog of the same title of this entry
in it, it contains all my life happenings, but narrated in another name.

i closed it, thinking it no longer serve its purpose, as my life stories should be kept to those that know me, those that took part in my life.

and today, looking into her eyes, seeing her vibrant smile,
i realised our maturity difference is not only that mere 213days.

i had always thought im already very good. alright, maybe i have always been too confident of my abilities, too confident in my strength, so much so that it had overshadowed my weaknesses. friends have been protective and kind, as they have not put it squarely across me.

but today, i realised, there are so many better people out there.
that my acheivements are nth, absolute nothing in comparison to the so many much more better people out there.

i have always been trying very hard in everything that i choose to do, not giving up and perserve till i succeed.

since young, i was overshadowed by the smarter sister i have. everyone was encouraging, saying that im only more playful, instead of saying that im dumber den her. i didnt enter the em1 stream during pri 4 streaming, and it took mum quite some effort to enter, eventually. and i finally proved myself, by pwning sis by mere 4 marks in PSLE. i hate to be despised. i hate to be a shadow.

after entering sec sch, i got to know of a frenz that is a lifeguard, and i took a interest in it. but by the time i was to take the test for bronze medallion, i was wrongfully diagnosed as eardrum burst.being very sick, i still went for the test anyway, but was stopped by the examiner, seeing how sick i was. i was so upset about no longer being able to swim. but the mistake was corrected, and i got my BM alot slower den my group. i wun stop until im forced to. i will only press on like a bull.

in poly, im a loser. i can tell the world, without my mates, i wun be able to make it to uni. it is they who made going uni a must, and they are the ones that push me thru. during year1, all i did in class was to talk to some girls. yea, if u guys read it, u guys will knw hu im talking about. its damn easy to guess. i was even questioned about why im constantly smiling to myself in the screens. eventually, i didnt get the girl, but my best consolation was that friendship fostered, though i guess by now, they are already almost gone.

i went for community service, hoping that i can see the world, get rid of the fucked up mummy boii attitude, and hope that it would make me more mature(so that girls will fall for me=D ) but unfortunately, it not only didnt make me the guy i wan to be, it allowed me to be exposed to more of my own weaknesses and the harshness of the outside world. i couldnt take it during a period of time, and i almost break down. it would be hard to imagine the mighty b3n chai breaking down, as i have always been strong. luckily,it is the villagers there that taught me a valuable lesson. it has never only been about ur own tantrum, as it would definitely affect everyone else. u can be unhappy about something, but if u show it too obviously, everyone else would be affected, especially those that cared for u. my own mistake, im unhappy about it, i showed it, they thought its their fault, and they apologised to me. i felt like a fag. from then on, i would always try to be considerate to all those beside me, even if it meant i have a be happy when im very sad. and thats because, my dear friends, i dont want u guys to be sad because of me.

i went on to china. there, it made me realised what responsibility is. there, i learnt how to be independent. after my comm service, i was very confident in myself staying outside with friends. but there, with people u know so well, there still bound to be trouble and misunderstandings. i learnt some of it in the hard way, and im grateful that i had such special lessons there. im always the little boy in their eyes, not just because im younger in age wise, but also, of how childish i am when im in face with stress. i learnt to do my best in everything im involved in, even if its something thats totally out of my talent range. because effort will definitely be appreciated.

at the age of before 21, i have already enter hospital more than i can count. people says its a bad stuff, but i say, it made me take care of myself more, and let me know the importance of life. i have been overexerting myself for all these activities, making myself full of injuries and illness. im not going to stop, but i will better protect myself, as im afraid to go back hospital again. my advise here, dun waste ur life away with cigarette and alcohol. coz once damaged, it can never be repaired back to 100%

i have wriiten so much about myself, for im trying to reassure myself that i still have my merits, i still have my exclusive memories. im not a total nothing.
i need that confidence, i need to know i have certain advantages over others.


my story is not a least interesting,
but that's my life, a sad life.

心碎的声音
叮当地好听
我在收拾心情
但破碎的心灵
再美的手艺
再好的工具
也修补不了碎片的痕迹

ads @ my blog

Rofl..
even i myself didnt go into my blog for a long time..
i didnt even know theres nuffnang ads inside my blog... WTF

Eenie Meenie

Premarital Sex

Recently there is a change with the sex education whereby there are now external groups teaching this thingy.

And it led me to think of one problem that our generation face these few days: PREMARITAL SEX.

Yes, it might seemed all wrong to have premartial sex as there is no commitments between two persons yet. And many are saying that teenagers are having premarital sex at a younger age.

I DO NOT AGREE.

Our older generations got married at 17, and some even consider that being late.
for us, bo 30 yrs old also dun wan marry la...
so whats wrong with having sex at such age, though the biggest difference is still the marriage certificate.
in fact, i would think it might be unhealthy to have sex for the first time at a more mature age of like, 30yrs old.

So if u wanna discourage premarital sex, i guess the entire education shld change..
we are graduating at a far too old age. the ability to earn a living for our generation is getting older and older.
in the past, ppl 14 can go out earn a living.
but due to education, we can only work at the age of about 16 to 18, earliest. For uni MALE grads, lagi worst, approx 26 den can earn a living.
SO HOW TO COMMIT AND START A FAMILY AND HAVE SEX WITH A LEGAL WIFE???

so premarital sex is the only way out.


my conclusion?
older gen have sex at age ranging from 16 +++
younger gen also having sex at such age, only doing so before marriage.
and last but no least.

This post is crap.

SPirit Jailbreak (3.1.3 jailbreak )

This guide is for myself, as i kept forgetting the steps and the links i need.

IF YOUR IS NOT 3.1.3, DO THIS
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
First, make sure u patch ur itouch to 3.1.3
go to http://www.felixbruns.de/iPod/firmware/ and download the firmware
while saving, change the name of the file from .rar to .ipsw
(set to all files, den chnage in the name)


then, connect itouch to comp,
u will see itune load up.
shift + click on the restore button.
a window will come out and find the .ipsw file just downloaded.
and tada! u get 3.1.3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

IF YOUR ITOUCH IS 3.1.3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Make sure it is a clean copy
(meaning, if u previously jailbroken before on your 3.1.2, den upgraded to 3.1.3, u have to REINSTALL 3.1.3)

now go to http://spiritjb.com/
click on the word "windows" to download the spirit jailbreaker device. (click on MAC if your using a mac book)
connect to your ipod touch to comp.
open the spirit program, click Jailbreak
TADA!~ JAILBROKEN!!

now u needa appsync
on ur WIFI and make sure ur connected
Go to Cydia
Tap on Manage tab
Tap on sources
Tap on “Edit” and then on “Add” , type in the hackulo.us repository which is http://cydia.hackulo.us/
Tap on Add Source
click on the hackulous and install "appsync for OS 3.1",
Install and Confirm

you will have a appsync-able jailbroken devicEE!!!

WEBBIES TO DOWNLOAD YOUR APPS FER JAILBROKEN DEVICEE
www.appleiso.com
http://litefree.com/
http://apptrackr.org/troll.php

Sianz.. i lost my itouch, but i didnt lose my touch =D
but idk why i did this also..
of no use to me now...

my love will get u home